Wednesday, October 17, 2012

rediscovering myself

First order of business this morning: I get scared to write. So when I'm absent for days on end, that's likely why. It's not so much that I'm worried about you reading, it's more worry about what will emerge from the depths of me. You see, I'm on a journey. I've fought it for a while. But it finally occurred to me not to fear who I am becoming but to embrace it and not just enjoy the ride but be an active participant. Audacious, I know! So there's that. 

Now, about this journey... this transition. Where to begin?

I was raised in the Mormon church. I seriously questioned those beliefs in my teenage years and formally left the church when I was 20. Ever since, I've generally considered myself atheist/agnostic. In doing so, I neglected anything of spiritual nature, believing that was either nonsense or not a valid use of my time. All the while though, I've felt drawn to the belief that there is something else... something more. I've struggled with the idea that we live-we die-the end. I don't believe there is some man out there beyond that is God. But some kind of collective wisdom of every being, every soul ~woman, animal, rock & tree~ that has ever been... that resonates.

Right now, what I am drawn to most is absorbing information and more so, realizing and acknowledging the power that surrounds me. From crystals, the moon, within, beyond. Embracing my own soul and femininity seems like a good place to start and I'm feeling the pull of all these things. 

Years ago, a shaman friend gifted me two lovely stones, amethyst and quartz, and recently I have started to build a collection. I am beginning a meditation practice and have found that using these powerful crystals enhance and perhaps add focus to the experience.  This gorgeous piece arrived yesterday from Polly's shop and I am in awe. It is absolutely stunning

zara. amethyst necklace by polly
Brushing off the cobwebs and realizing I still have a soul has led me on an adventure. There are many more facets to my history, present, and future. I hope to share them with you and overcome my fears of digging deeper. 


  1. wishing you well on this new journey of yours. Tune in to yourself, really listen to your hearts musings, your souls whispers and listen out there in that big old world .... the trees and the whole of the earth whisper too. X

  2. I wish you well on your journey! I think it is great you are looking towards a more spiritual path and learning about new things. Crystals, and Reiki are definitely something I've been interested in learning more about lately. :) Its fun to resonate with new things and then learn about them, their is wisdom in everything

    1. Thanks! There is an entire realm of things to help us learn and grow and it's great to know I'm among so many before me who have begun down this path.

  3. You don't have a Soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.


    This post was inspiring, I know that it's quite old, but still inspiring. Forgive my delay, but I've just discovered you a couple of hours ago (and your blog is lovely). I, myself, am a Stone Reader for those who wish to explore their spirituality, and develop it through the tools of Gaia. So if you'd ever like a little help, or are just curious, I'd love to offer you a reading free of charge. My life goal is helping others on their path to spiritual enlightenment.

    My website is, if you're interested.

    Thank you so much for the pleasure of reading such personal thoughts. I wish you the best on your journey. ♥

    ~Tarot Kristy